Conflict is our business.
As successful psychotherapists we spend a lot of time showing people how to resolve conflict that results in solutions and builds trust. As trust increases, future conflict decreases.
The result: amazing relationships.
The conflict resolution tools that we give therapy clients can be applied to business with the same stunning results.
It all starts with adopting the ‘We’ perspective.
When couples make a decision to come into therapy it is often because conflict has become intolerable. Each person in the couple is convinced that they are right. Each person spends their time trying to cajole or manipulate the other to their point of view. They are like two boxers in a ring. They are secure in their corners and when the bell rings, they come out swinging ready to win the battle.
While someone may “win” in this scenario, it comes at a cost. Just because someone concedes a point or agrees to do something your way does not mean they leave that interaction satisfied. Resentment builds, often bleeding into the next conflict.
What can change this forever? Approaching everything as a ‘We’.
If there is a problem, then it is a problem for the couple, not an individual problem. Rather than she is neglecting me, the question becomes: How can we better connect? When couples adopt a ‘We’ mentality and work to find solutions, conflict decreases, communication improves, and passion is rekindled.
The same ‘We’ mentality works in the business world.
When conflict arises, managers often start pointing fingers, much like those boxers in a ring. As a leader, your responsibility is to create a ‘We” culture, guiding everyone to look at issues as problems to face together.
You are probably thinking that this is easier said than done.
Don’t despair. We have step by step instructions that will build a sense of ‘We”, turning conflict resolution into team building.
Get all points of view: Get the stakeholders into a room and give everyone an opportunity to be heard.
Achieve clarity: A variety of issues may come up. Trying to tackle them all at once will lead to confusion and frustration. Create a list and work with the group to prioritize the issues. Focus everyone’s attention on the issue that will be addressed first.
Brainstorm solutions: Every idea has value. Let people think out of the box and don’t judge. Some of the craziest ideas may become the inspiration for THE great idea. Accepting all input communicates value and respect to your team.
Evaluate solutions: Lead the group in a discussion of the options that include the pros and cons and potential future impacts to the company. Be open to a new way of thinking.
Build consensus or at least mutual understanding: After analyzing the options, make a decision. Not every final decision can be made by the group. If an executive decision needs to be made, communicate how the team’s input influenced the decision.
Compliment and debrief: Throughout the process show appreciation for the insights of your team. As important as solutions is building the sense that you are all in this together. Once the process is finished, take time with your staff to reflect on lessons learned.
Following all of these steps will develop a ‘We’ mentality in your team and make resolving conflict a breeze.
If you need help getting your teams on the same page, we are your one stop shop for the answers. From the front line to the C Suite, G2 Solutions, can transform how you do business. Contact us for a free consultation.
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